Pretty Hard to Swallow

By now most people are aware of Hillary Clinton's "comments" late last week concerning the assassination of Robert Kennedy. Under constant pressure on why she doesn't quit the Democrat Primary race, Senator Clinton offered the following, which became the soundbite heard 'round the world:

"My husband did not wrap up the nomination in 1992 until he won the California primary somewhere in the middle of June, right? We all remember Bobby Kennedy was assassinated in June in California. I don't understand it."

Condemnation was quick and universal, with conventional wisdom ranging from mistake to something so catastrophic it might force her from the race. One of our Memorial Day Weekend guests had a different take. Admittedly a Barack Obama supporter, the man posited that it was extraordinarily likely that, akin to many other of Senator Clinton's so-called "gaffes" (white people won't vote for him, anyone?), this comment was also calculated. We had some good-spirited debate Sunday evening.

Monday morning, exhausted and half-delirious, I realized that there were three arguments that could totally disprove the charge that Hillary Clinton's RFK comments were calculated. I stumbled from bed and wrote them down. I know the story has largely moved on, and more importantly, when I looked at what I had written, 'twas not nearly so magical as it felt while writing in my delirium, but I still found them worth sharing:


For you to believe that what Hillary Clinton said about Robert Kennedy's assassination was premeditated and calculated, you have to believe three increasingly unlikely propositions:

1. You have to believe that in her heart of hearts, Hillary Clinton wants Barack Obama to die. Now, you can roam back and forth across the fruited plain and rarely find someone more critical of the Clintons than I. I consider them base, venal, and Machiavellian in the extreme, so much so that I almost—not quite but almost—am willing to believe the whole Lewisnky scandal was done to hide much bigger wrongdoing with China and India and our national security.

I think the Clintons are relentless, power-hungry and capable of much to keep that power, but even I had a hard time with the rumors of all their so-called enemies they had bumped off over the years. However, even if I were to go down that road of darkness, the key word is their enemies. To believe Hillary Clinton planned all this out, we have to believe that she wants a man dead whose vision for America is virtually identical to her own, whose only "crime" against her is to have played the delegate game about 10% better than she, all while allowing to live the Monicas, the Paula Joneses, the Rushes and that vast cast of right-wing enemies who would gladly dance on her grave.

That's pretty hard to swallow.

2. You have to believe that Hillary and Bill Clinton, razor-sharp political strategists that they are, will be counting on Obama's supporters, in particular Black America, without whose virtually unfettered support she cannot win the election, to go along with this. I mention Black America, who mere weeks after the much-publicized comments will be expected to turn around and support this woman. Black America, it should be noted, are as a group at times a bit nutty with the conspiracy theories, especially when it comes to assassination, and who can blame them? They have had to endure prophetic and inspiring voices such as Martin, Malcolm, Tupac and Biggie silenced, while others, such as Jackson, Sharpton, Jackson (the musical one), and Tyson are allowed to bray on and on, no matter how much damage they do team Black People.

That's pretty hard to swallow.

3. Perhaps most incredibly, for you to believe that Hillary Clinton has schemed her master plan to stay in and win this race, you have to believe that she would not just quietly do the deed herself. It would make much more sense, should this actually be a plan, for Hillary Clinton and Co. to take some of that 109 million earned over the last 8 years and purchase the services of a series of professional hitmen, one to whack Obama, one to whack and therefore silence the man who whacks Obama, one to whack the man who whacks the man who whacks Obama and on and on until you get all the way to Pierre Salinger, whom no one is going to believe anyway, so you might as well leave him alone.

But no, instead of quietly ensuring that Obama is taken down, you instead have to believe that Senator Clinton is counting on the aid of a Republican to do her dirty work. For friends, you cannot possibly believe that Hillary Clinton believes there exists in this great country of ours a Democrat who is simultaneously both a racist and a gun-owner. You just cannot.

Therefore, Hillary Clinton is counting on a redneck racist Republican, possibly one of the weekend militia types that she loves so much—and they her, of course, to first of all hear her and listen, and then act. Somewhere out there in the woods of Montana, the bayous of Mississippi, or possibly the O.C., there is a man who has wanted to kill Obama, but for whatever reason hasn't been motivated to do so, until hearing his mistresses siren call, and deciding to act.

Yes, it may be possible that Hillary Clinton planned this all out ahead of time, and has the master plan going, rather than just stumbling under pressure to quit and saying something ill-conceived, but that's pretty hard to swallow.

May 26, 2008


Anonymous said...

I heard that Monica Lewinsky never found anything that was pretty hard to swallow.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe Obama said this, I can only assume by this statement that either he's a dumb ass or he can see dead people - (first 10 seconds)

RC said...

maybe we should start this primary process all over again. you know...with some different people.

it's going to be a goofy election.

rennratt said...

I'm with RC on this one.

I'm having a difficult time, this election, deciding on which candidate I like the LEAST.

I think they all suck.

Anonymous said...

I voted republican this year. The democrats left a bad taste in my mouth.